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Bouldin Law Firm
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Can I Divorce With Less Conflict?

Conflict is defined as a serious disagreement or argument, typically a protracted one.  Without conflict of at least some type, we would not even have divorce at all.  That said, there are many ways to avoid or limit the conflict during a divorce or dissolution and throughout the process. Unfortunately, there are times when avoiding the conflict only leads to more problems and financial devastation While either party may create conflict, either may also choose to disengage.  The significant problems arise when one party wants to continue conflict in order to get retribution, revenge or right a perceived wrong.  Often one or both parties feel that the other has wronged them, thereby causing the divorce.  Having practiced domestic law for over 20 years, I have a fairly unique insight into the mental gymnastics that litigants often play during the process.

  1. No one is right.  In any relationship that fails, there are always two sides and different viewpoints on what caused the relationship to fail.  The rare case is where one party is truly an ass, womanizer, wife beater with a saint for a spouse.  At the very least, the spouse stayed too long, allowed abuse to happen/continue, or chose very poorly.
  2. No one is wrong. Sometimes relationships simply fail.  Very few people remain best friends with their grade school buddy, nor do they marry their first girlfriend.  People change throughout their lives and it is to uncommon for spouses to change differently throughout their lives.  The outside world, stresses, children, jobs, friends and family all change, it is impossible to envision both being the same person at 50 that they were at 25 - nor would most want to be.

.  Collaborative law is one way to attempt to limit the conflict as well as limit the costs involved in a dissolution.  When you meet an attorney, ask about how to avoid conflict.  Ask about how to keep the children out of the middle of the divorce. Listen to the advice of the attorney, there is a reason that we are often referred to as a counselor-at-law. For a consultation in Northern Kentucky, call Michael Bouldin at 859-581-6453 or email at [email protected]  581-MIKE.

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